By wendy, on August 11th, 2010%
There’s a new blog carnival in town, hosted by Jolene at Graceful Agony, and the topic of the first edition is, “Let Me Introduce Myself.” This is my least favorite topic in the entire world, since I am NOT good at telling people who I am.
I think a big part of the problem is simply that there’s just so much to say, and the connections aren’t very logical. (I’m a Pisces, logic just isn’t part of my makeup. Intuition, emotion, passion: yes; history: I’ve got tons; logic: not so much.)
I’m a mass of contradictions, a mess of chronic illnesses, a pile of insecurities; and very much a product of my past. Continue reading Introductions Again? Yikes! »
By wendy, on July 25th, 2010%
We don’t say it often enough, do we? Thank you . . . Two simple words, but it can be so hard to remember to say them. Not for the big stuff, we usually remember when someone gives us something big, but how often do we remember when someone listens to us? How often do we thank our friends for just being there for us; for listening, for understanding, and for giving us the strength to keep going when all we want to do is curl up and die?
I know I don’t tell my friends how much I appreciate them nearly enough, so when I found out that the new PFAM blog carnival topic is “the nicest thing(s) anyone has done for you since you became ill,” I decided it was time for some “thank yous.”
I have a LOT of friends, both real life and online, and they’ve done TONS of nice things for me. I’ve been given computers, and televisions, and a home; I’ve had friends lend me heating pads, and cook dinner on my night to cook, and give me rides to work. . .
My wonderful friends have done more for me than I could ever repay if I had a million years to do it in; but the best thing they’ve ever done is just listened to me when I needed to talk about how bad I felt, how scared I was, and even when I was suicidal. Continue reading The Best Friends in the World »
By wendy, on June 13th, 2010%
“Passion is the energy that comes from bringing more of YOU into what you do.” –Curt Rosengren
When I saw the topic of this edition of the ChronicBabe Blog carnival, it threw me a bit. After all, passion requires energy, and energy tends to be in short supply when you have a chronic illness because dealing with all the crap that goes along with being sick drains you. As I thought about it, though, I realized that passion also PROVIDES energy, and the more passionate you are about something, the more energy that passion gives you.
Work is a good example of this idea – watch the people who love their work. They always have the energy they need to do what they love doing, even when they’re sick. The passion they feel for their work helps them find a way to do what they need to do, and even seems to help reduce the severity of their symptoms.
Contrast that with those who hate their jobs, who are just putting in the time they have to so that they can bring home that check, or keep that insurance, and survive just a bit longer. Continue reading Find Your Passion, Find Your LIFE . . . »
By wendy, on June 7th, 2010%
Do you suffer from bipolar disorder or depression? Are you pregnant, or planning to get pregnant?
If so, and you’re taking an SSRI (Prozac, Paxil, Celexa, Zoloft, Sarafem, Lexapro, Luvox) or SNRI (Cymbalta, Effexor, Pristiq) type antidepressant medication, or a combination of two different types of antidepressants, you may want to talk to your doctor about other options during your pregnancy. A new study published in the Canadian Medical Association Journal reports that taking these medications during pregnancy increases the chances of spontaneous abortion (miscarriage) by MORE than two-thirds (68%.)
WARNING:
Withdrawal from these medications is extremely dangerous, and should never be attempted without the supervision of a qualified specialist with experience in handling “Antidepressant Discontinuation Syndrome.” The symptoms of withdrawal can be more severe than the original symptoms, even when doses are only reduced, rather than stopped entirely.
Sources:
Canadian Medical Association Journal, abstract: http://www.cmaj.ca/cgi/content/abstract/cmaj.091208v1
Baker, S.L. (2010). “Antidepressants during pregnancy cause alarming 68 percent increased risk of miscarriage” (retrieved June 7, 2010). http://www.naturalnews.com/028943_antidepressants_miscarriage.html
By wendy, on May 30th, 2010%
Chronic illness is a life-changing experience for everyone, and each person’s journey is very different; but there are experiences we all recognize as well. How many of us have lost jobs, friends, spouses, homes, and family members to our disease? No matter what illness we have, we share so much that we can connect on a level that many will never understand unless the journey comes to them. We share symptoms, and losses, and lessons; and we share the understanding that our lives will never be the same because the illness, the journey, has changed us in ways that can never be undone. Even if we were to wake up tomorrow and be healthy again, even if by some miracle we were cured; the experience has changed us in fundamental ways, and the lessons it has taught us can never be unlearned.
My journey began many years ago, and it has changed my life so much that when I look back I barely recognize the woman I was. I was married, and miserable, and convinced that I was too stupid to ever be able to take care of myself without a man to tell me what I thought, what I wanted, and what I felt. I was depressed and suicidal, dissociative, and having flashbacks that I thought were delusions or hallucinations. I was terrified that I was losing my mind, and more terrified to tell anyone what was happening for fear that I really WAS “going crazy.”
I can pinpoint the exact moment that my journey through illness began, too. Not with a time or a date, but with an event; an event so ordinary, so innocuous, that I could never have suspected the effect it would have on my life. Continue reading My Chronic Illness Journey – The Trip I Never Expected (or WANTED) to Take »
By wendy, on May 29th, 2010%
The new ChronicBabe Blog Carnival theme is favorite self-care tools and techniques, and will go live on Tuesday June 1.
I love this topic . . . self-care is a very important part of managing a chronic illness, and we all deserve to take good care of ourselves. I use a lot of non-medication methods to manage the symptoms of my multiple chronic illnesses (the short list is fibromyalgia and bipolar disorder, but if you’re really interested in the entire list, check my “Who Am I” page,) and I love sharing them with anyone they might help. I use a lot of aromatherapy and herbal teas for symptom control; and stress reduction techniques to minimize flares, anxiety, and bipolar cycling; so let’s get started. Continue reading You CAN Feel Better: Self-care Tips and Tricks for Fibromyalgia and Bipolar Disorder »
By wendy, on April 15th, 2010%
 http://www.flickr.com/photos/nauright/3828964801/
Dammit, I KNOW better than to do this . . . But, being the stubborn bitch I am, I manage to do it to myself whenever I stop paying attention, and let myself forget that just because I usually keep my bipolar very well controlled doesn’t mean I can’t trigger it.
Work scheduled me for more hours than usual this week, and it’s been really busy, so I ended up staying 90 minutes late two nights this week. That cuts WAAAAAY into the time I have for the stuff I need to do at home, so I’ve been staying up late to get everything done. BAD idea! Very, very, VERY bad idea.
Last night I got about 6 hours, and the night before I only got 3 (not entirely my fault, I woke up and couldn’t go back to sleep.) Anyway, when hubby got up to get ready for work, I nearly drove him nuts talking “at” him. This is NOT a good sign . . . Talking like that is always the first sign that I’m starting a manic or hypomanic episode, so it’s time to take steps. Continue reading Oooops, I Screwed Up, AGAIN »
By wendy, on April 12th, 2010%
Another bipolar man has died due to the lack of training in dealing with the mentally ill, and the family has filed suit against the police department as a result, according to JusticeNewsFlash.com.
These kinds of deaths are so totally unnecessary, and it pisses me off to know that any one of us could be killed by police, just because they are totally clueless about how to deal with mentally ill people who are in crisis. This seems to be a bit more than just ignorance though, since Mr. Cardall’s family claims that after tasing him twice on his bare chest, police officers left him laying face down in the dirt, totally ignoring his wife’s requests that they check and make sure he didn’t need medical attention. Continue reading Yet Another Mentally Ill Person Killed by Police »
By wendy, on April 12th, 2010%
 http://www.flickr.com/photos/emeryway/3125395803/ We’ve all been there – many of us deal with it every day . . . the well-meaning friend or family member who comes running every time there’s a new pill or treatment available for our chronic illness. We know they just want to “help” us get better, but it’s crazy-making to constantly be bombarded with new things to try. It’s especially bad when we try the wonderful new treatment, and it DOESN’T WORK! Then we get to deal with their disappointment and questions about, “Are you sure you’re doing it right?” or “Did the doctor give you a strong enough dosage?”
Healthy people mostly only have experience with things like colds, flu, and infections; with maybe a few injuries thrown in. For simple stuff like this, it’s easy — take a few pills for the symptoms of the cold or flu, and in a week or so, it’s gone; take an antibiotic for about 10 days, and the infection is CURED. Injuries involve some down time for healing, and maybe a little physical therapy, and everything is back to normal. Because this is all the experience they have with illness, they assume that ALL illness is like that.
I call it “the antibiotic theory of chronic illness.” Continue reading Are Well-Meaning Friends/Family Driving You Crazy? »
By wendy, on March 15th, 2010%
I had one of those horrible days today (actually, it seems to be a bit of a pattern lately.) I’m normally pretty calm at home, but shortly after I walk into work I’m furious, and I stay that way until well after I leave.
I work in the deli at a grocery store, which probably isn’t the best kind of job for someone who’s bipolar. It’s extremely stressful when it’s busy, but I don’t have much choice if I want to eat. The real issue for me is that we’re expected to wait on customers; price, rotate, and stock product; mark down anything that’s approaching expiration; pull, scan, and throw away expired product; make deli trays for special orders; cut and package block cheeses; slice meat for the department that makes the custom subs; help customers find things, answer the phone, and keep everything clean. (Oh, you have to drop everything and update the temperature log every 4 hours, too. )
We NEED two people working during the busy times, one to slice and wait on customers, and one to work on everything else; but they never schedule more than one person. It is absolutely impossible for one person to keep up with everything they expect you to do. Continue reading Bipolar Rage: Am I the Only One? »
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